Where to start.
Life has been a blur as of late. January came and went with negative Wisconsin temps and even lower windchills, lots of snow and ice and staying inside. Our bedroom window had a thick layer of ice around the rim and Daniel even brought the coffee pot out of storage so we could wake up to brewing coffee last Saturday morning. (It’s the little things, am I right?). All that to say, I splurged on airfare to Florida because I just. can’t. take. it. I’ll just be over here, counting down the days until May.
This past weekend was the Women’s Retreat at Spring Creek – I went with my mom and was surprised by how filled I felt once we left. I felt joy and conviction but not the guilt kind. If was more of the “I want to do better” kind. The speaker touched on being REAL women, building each other up instead of tearing each other down because of our insecurities and comparison. She talked about being uncommon women in a world we’re all trying to mold to in an effort to be accepted. The message hit too close to home for this introverted, don’t rock the boat twentysomething year old. Too often I find myself going along with what others are saying/doing for fear of being the odd one out. The ugly duckling. I’ve been looking over my notes a few times since then, not wanting to forget what I learned and how I felt this weekend.
On Sunday morning, I started the book Jesus Is _______ because I apparently needed a little more conviction in my life and Judah. Smith. Let me tell you. Having grown up in the church, the concepts aren’t new to me but the way he describes and elaborates on God’s grace – how He is overflowing with it yet we are so conservative with it – put it in a whole new light. He uses the example, if God came down and saw [whoever you’re judging], he asks what we think God’s reaction would be. Well of course God would see their sin, how they messed up there and screwed up with that. Judah goes on to say that our God – who made the Universe, who holds the stars in His hands – would overlook the wrong and forgive [that person], judgement being the last thing on His mind. “But I love them.” If God, who gave us His Son, who was crucified for. us., can look down at earth and see love and have compassion, who am I to judge?! Heavy but so so freeing at the same time. What a God we serve. What a weekend.
Getting off my soap box now to touch on other news… work has been slow, kind of dragging on, and I find myself dreaming of the future when we have a little family of our own and I no longer need to work the 9-5 corporate job (or 8-4 to be more precise). I texted Daniel the other day that I had baby fever; overhearing conversations about my friends’ babies, thinking back to my days of nannying and what I’ll tuck away for tips and tricks down the road or what I’d do differently. I have baby fever in a very real way but in a very scared way too. I know it’s not the right time… I have so much to learn about being a wife let alone a mother – we’re tackling debt head on and making large strides, but we’re also not financially stable enough yet to support another life – this cozy white apartment can’t fit much else at the current moment. So for now, it’s a sweet little {reoccuring} daydream.
Tonight was a nice, productive night but has seemed to go by at an enjoyably slow pace. I’ve mentally checked the box of multiple things on my list while also spending quality time with Daniel which we all know I need. I left work on-time (surprise surprise) and made it home by 4:30p. I tied up my running sneakers and donned my obnoxiously bright hilighter pink running shorts and striped sports bra and hit the pavement (ahem, black rubber of the treadmill because, hello, Wisconsin and negative windchills). The endorphins and the runners high keeps me coming back. I am, by no means, an avid runner. But I do think I’m finding my groove and a tempo I can stay consistent with throughout my two miles. My mental state thanks me every time. I’ve noticed I am one of those weird people that run for their mental and emotional wellbeing more than their physical wellbeing. But I’ll take it either way. Dinner was a breeze as well – I found an app, Meallime, that I’ve been using to meal prep every week. It literally makes it the easiest thing ever, having all the week’s meals and all the groceries for every meal in one consolidated place. I really have no idea how or why I tried meal prepping without it. Especially doing Whole30. Just thinking about it makes me feel exhausted. Woof. So spoiled with this little app. Minimal ingredients and ~30 prep/cook time. Look at me go, raving about a meal prep app and this isn’t even sponsored.
It’s now 9p and my eyes are heavy. I think it’s about time to curl up on the couch with Nova and sip my Trader Joe’s Ginger Turmeric tea before crawling into bed next to an already asleep Mr.
Good night.
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