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Comfort Zones

December 1, 2018December 2, 2018by Hailey MadisenLeave a Comment

I begin just about every post thinking to myself, How is it already fillintheblank. In this case, how is it already December? In 5 days (that I know will fly by), we will have been married for two whole months. I feel like I’ve only blinked my eyes and we’re here. But it’s been easy. Really easy. And I feel anxious saying that, like I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop. But it’s Daniel so I’m not really sure why I expected anything other than ease.

We’ve had both our younger sisters over this past week; Daniel’s sister Bek was over last night to watch the Jim Carrey Grinch with us. I made a roast and twice baked stuffed potatoes with artichoke and tomatoes. Tonight, Sadie came over and helped me throw together a Whole30 rendition of Zuppa Toscana (for the second time this week) that I sipped my 19 Crimes red wine with – a match made in heaven. I helped her with her wedding registry, 149 days and counting, which I’m pretty sure I enjoyed far more than she did. But I digress.

Daniel and I dreamed up our 5 Year Goals earlier this week and it gave me butterflies to think about our future together. We talked about things we wanted to do on our own (release two more albums for Daniel, finish writing a novel for me), as well as together – start a family. It’s crazy when we talk about our future, I picture so many kids running around. I am equally as scared for that next chapter as I am yearning for it. I know we aren’t quite ready now (see first paragraph noting only two months of marriage) but I know that whenever I say yes, Daniel will be waiting with so much excitement.

Also on our list was clean living. I have been super into wellness the last year and my curiosity is growing. I want to learn everything I can about all YoungLiving products and my current every-day products. It’s crazy the more you read into the harmful chemicals and hormone disrupters in most products that line the shelves. It’s going to be so hard for me to no longer go into Target and purchase the prettiest lotion or body spray. I’m learning to be more conscious about what goes into and onto my body and it’s going to be a journey I can tell. I stepped out of my comfort zone and started a new oily Instagram all about it too. Part of me wants more followers (i.e. enneagram 2’s need to be liked, need for approval), while the other part of me wants to keep this on private and not let anyone know it’s me (fear of rejection). Trying to find balance between wanting to be heard and influence others on my wellness journey while also keeping my inner introvert protected. Cheers to ending 2018 outside my comfort zone with this new Insta and my sweet little blog.

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What A Beautiful Name

November 25, 2018by Hailey MadisenLeave a Comment

If you happened to see a twenty-something blonde woman driving around Brookfield in her little blue Volvo station wagon … ugly crying … with tissues stuffed up her nose, this would be why. And I apologize for the sight. But we serve an am-a-zing God!

What A Beautiful Name - Live
Hillsong Worship
 
You were the Word at the beginning,
One With God the Lord Most High.
Your hidden glory in creation
Now revealed in You our Christ.
 
 What a beautiful Name it is,
What a beautiful Name it is —
The Name of Jesus Christ my King.
 
 What a beautiful Name it is,
Nothing compares to this.
What a beautiful Name it is,
The Name of Jesus.
  
You didn't want heaven without us,
So Jesus, You brought heaven down.
My sin was great, Your love was greater.
What could separate us now?
 
What a wonderful Name it is,
What a wonderful Name it is —
The Name of Jesus Christ my King.
 
What a wonderful Name it is,
Nothing compares to this.
What a wonderful Name it is,
The Name of Jesus.
What a wonderful Name it is,
The Name of Jesus.
 
How sweet is your name, Lord, how good You are.
Love to sing in the name of the Lord, love to sing it for you all.
Death could not hold You, the veil tore before You.
You silenced the boast, of sin and grave.
The heavens are roaring, the praise of Your glory.
For You are raised to life again.
 
 You have no rival, You have no equal.
Now and forever God you reign.
Yours is the Kingdom, Yours is the glory,
Yours is the name above all names.
  
What a powerful Name it is,
What a powerful Name it is —
The Name of Jesus Christ my King.
 
What a powerful Name it is,
Nothing can stand against,
What a powerful name it is,
The Name of Jesus.
 
You have no rival, You have no equal.
Now and forever, God, You reign.
Yours is the Kingdom, Yours is the glory,
Yours is the name above all names.
 
 What a powerful Name it is,
What a powerful Name it is —
The Name of Jesus Christ my King.
  
What a powerful Name it is,
Nothing can stand against.
What a powerful name it is, the Name of Jesus.
What a powerful name it is, the Name of Jesus.
What a powerful name it is, the Name of Jesus.

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The Last Thirty-Six Hours

November 18, 2018November 22, 2018by Hailey MadisenLeave a Comment

Friday morning, we both woke up with scratchy throats and stuffy noses and by the time we left work, we had agreed to spend all weekend on the couch, fighting what were now full blown colds. “Spend all weekend on the couch” first meant stopping at Panera for Autumn Squash soup and a doctored up grilled cheese (with bacon) for dipping. Then we were homeward bound for the next thirty-six hours. During this time, I caught up on Carrie Bradshaw’s life, reorganized the kitchen cupboards and, of course, added to the Goodwill donation pile.

There’s something about being sick together that just makes it more manageable. My head was pounding and my nose the confusing mix of stuffy-runny, but the occasional glance-over-and-smile’s from Daniel or the few times he would reach over and touch my leg from his corner of the couch made me forget for a few seconds. Butterflies. I am married. This still hits me weird sometimes. I am married! To the best man I have ever met, too — and I told him that yesterday. Of all the ~~men~~ boys I have liked in the past, he easily surpasses them all. He is more genuine and supportive, more driven and patient than. anyone. I know, have known or have crushed on. And it’s crazy… he was just sitting in front of my face the entire time.

Today’s agenda consists of a few to do’s followed by a whole lotta nothin’. After church at 11AM, we’re planning a coffee date to Colectivo by the lakefront. This was a staple when we spent time together three years ago — I would drive us from my little Center street apartment, down to Colectivo where we would order warm bevies and walk over to the lake. We once watched the prettiest heat lightning storm across the water… and also watched a couple express their love for each other on a flag pole a few yards away. (You win some, you lose some.). After coffee, we’ll pick up our groceries and may or may not start meal prepping for our three work days this week. Thursday is Thanksgiving which has me internally jumping for joy doing cartwheels. My favorite holiday, split between my two favorite families, both eating the best homemade meals I have ever had. To say I am excited for this week would be an understatement.

At Home

Winter Camping and the Journey Ahead

November 10, 2018May 12, 2019by Hailey MadisenLeave a Comment

Last night, I somehow allowed Daniel to convince me to go camping with little to no prodding on his part. Looking back, I am not exactly sure why I agreed so readily to camping with him the day of our first snowfall and winds at 20mph. But I did. And I lived to tell about it. I don’t think I will go again any time soon but I am very glad for the experience and the ability to say that I did it! We were packed up and driving home around 9AM; on the drive, Daniel thanked me for coming with him to which I responded, “I know a good way to say thank you.” He guessed Starbucks and right he was. Nothing like a warm Starbies to make me feel all kinds of happy. I’ll most likely take the rest of the day to recover (aka raise my body temperature from freezing, apply and then reapply Blue Tansy facial oil to my poor, sensitive wind burned face and do a whole lot of nothing) until Daniel’s niece’s birthday party at 4PM.

When Daniel and I got home, after long, hot showers, we relaxed on the couch with our coffee and dreamt about the future. I was saying how much I love our little apartment, how cozy it is and how I feel so settled. We talked about the upcoming holidays and I mentioned wanting a few more YoungLiving products to add to my collection. I am all about ditching-and-switching but it has been a slow going process. I told Daniel my goal for 2019 is to cut back on all the perfumes, lotions, candles that are adding toxins to the air/my skin and replace all with more natural products. He suggested I research how to make these on my own and that actually made me feel giddy. I love how he supports me and just knows that I would love to do that. Find all the organic, clean products, free of chemicals and hormone-disrupters and create all my own cleaning, beauty products. I have already dubbed 2019 my year of wellness — physical, emotional and mental.

For physical wellness, I am really good at the starting part, not so much the follow-through-and-get-fit part. I have a passion for running but soon lose that passion after about a month or so of carrying on the habit. I have what I think is a “that’s good enough” mentality. I do really well and as soon as it’s “good enough”, I quit. Because why keep going when you’ve already reached good enough? (Hey, I know it’s silly but I’m being honest. Don’t knock my vulnerability!). I have also had a hard time in Wisconsin once Daylight Savings rolls around and the days grow shorter and seem to stay darker for all but five hours. I need to keep my mind focused and energized with a game plan this winter and not fall back into the typical I Need A Vacation STAT slump. I’ve already started scratching down ideas in my little black notebook, so excited for this journey. And now that I have spoken it into existence, I can’t back down. I will use my 0 readers of this little blog as motivation to keep going. (But really.)

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Filled to Overflowing

November 4, 2018November 22, 2018by Hailey MadisenLeave a Comment

It’s been a while since I’ve added to this little corner of mine — not much of significance has happened but many little intimate details have made October pass in what seems like the blink of an eye. I just said to Daniel tonight, “How is it that we’ve already figured out a marriage routine??” Sundays are for meal prepping and doing laundry. Tuesdays have remained date-night, eating out or cooking at home. Wednesday is his small-group, Thursday is mine. It doesn’t feel as though we have been married long enough as to have made routines, while simultaneously, it feels as though this is the way it has always been. How can these two feelings co-exist?

Two weekends ago, I got little sleep and yet my cup felt full. Kenzie and I went to a women’s conference in IL where the action call was to live as new creations — the theme was “God makes All Things New”. While I already have this constant reminder tattooed on my left arm, it was inspiring to hear the four different speakers talk about how we can live new lives, redeemed in and through Christ, for Christ. One of the organizations the Conference was donating monetary gifts as well as certain goods (underwear, tampons, bath towels, etc.) to was Refuge for Women — a “national faith-based organization providing a residential healing and recovery program for survivors of trafficking and sexual exploitation to receive safe housing, counseling, life and work skills development”. This type of charity weighs heavy on my heart so the next morning after our second session, we enjoyed a quick bite at Panera and then made our way to the local store to pick up the donation items. I only wish there was more I could have done…

The following Tuesday, we hosted Kenzie and J for dinner. This was our first time hosting dinner since being married and I was ecstatic. I had taken the day off work to check off the post-wedding errands (i.e. pick up the marriage certificate, sit in line at the Social Security office, sit in line at the DMV, etc.) and I also took some time to prep the large pan of Baked Ziti for our guests (which we’re still talking about; it was that good). Daniel was really looking forward to getting to know J since this was our first time spending time together two-on-two and I’d say it was a hit. J brought Bulleit Bourbon which they sipped on the rocks like old men while Kenzie and I opted for a rosé. We laughed so much my back hurt and I forgot it was Tuesday until I rolled into bed that night, heart full.

And then tonight. Daniel and I decided on a date night to good ol’ Olive Garden. We talked about his overnight camping experience the previous night (tent, almost freezing temps, rain) — which he loved. I enjoyed endless Zuppa Toscana, sipped my favorite cab wine and we left with rosy cheeks. We stopped at Starbucks for seasonal drinks on the way home and may or may not have had another baby-talk thrown in. Daniel would have liked to start a family… yesterday …while I have said we should wait five or so years. If I’m being honest, my timeframe may be wavering slightly.

And because I am still not over our wedding photos… one of my favorites.

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Nesting, Cont.

October 23, 2018November 22, 2018by Hailey MadisenLeave a Comment

How we already celebrated our two-week anniversary as husband and wife is beyond me. The days seem to be getting shorter and shorter, pushing each other out of the way. I am growing used to the idea of being a wife but at times, it still blindsides me — how am I married?! Daniel is, by far, the easiest person to live with and I am so happy I chose to do life with him.

This past weekend, we trekked up north to winterize the camper. The weather required us to bundle up and it snowed most of Saturday which made for the perfect excuse to stay cozy inside playing endless games of Sequence. We had the prettiest drive on the way to breakfast that morning; blurs of orange high above a white dusted ground made me smile ear to ear. I bought the cutest pair of up-cycled, locally made wool mittens that kept my fingers toasty and will all winter long.

Daniel had us awake and packing by 5:45AM Sunday morning and by 6:30AM, the camper was closed up and we were on our way to the nearest Starbucks (1-hour, 11-minutes away) for warm drinks and paninis. After our pitstop, we were IKEA bound. (This has become our monthly ritual.) He told me he wanted to get there early enough because he knew we would be spending about two hours testing out couches… and right he was. We slowly paced the showrooms testing out just about every couch we saw until we landed on the comfiest, cutest sectional. Signed, sealed and delivered Monday night, it sits assembled in our living room making our space just that much cozier. We really really love it — Daniel even calls it his “dream couch”.

∴ ∴ ∴

Things we’re going to laugh about one day:

Mom backing into Daniel’s car and crunching the driver’s side door the week of our wedding.
This passed Sunday night, we were both half asleep and rudely awoken by our bedroom window falling off the track. How?